I Didn’t Mean To Chapter Twenty One *Final*



It had been days since they had finally learned about Jackson’s contract situation and nothing was being done. Mark was going absolutely nuts. Jaebum had said he would handle it, and he trusted him but what was taking so long. Jackson continued to avoid Mark, still to hurt to look at his face and could Mark really blame him. He knew he should be preparing to face JYP but he was seriously worried about Jackson. The boy looked like all hope was lost. He wasn’t smiling anymore, he hardly ate and Mark could have sworn he heard Jackson crying in the shower. Jackson’s trip to BamBam’s room was evidence of that.

Jackson was spending much more time with the younger boy and while Mark was thankful that BamBam was helping him he couldn’t help but feel envious of the boy. All Mark ever wanted was to protect the other boy, to make sure Jackson was happy. It seemed that while Mark was so worried about being Jackson’s boyfriend he had failed at the most important thing, just being Jackson’s best friend. He never wanted any of this to happen and yet here he was, standing in the middle of a shit storm. Mark needed to do something, anything to get Jackson back.

Today they were supposed to be heading to the studio to practice some chorography but they had some free time before hand so Mark decided to suck it up and ask Jackson to talk to him. Mark knew that Jackson was avoiding their bedroom like the plague so the only obvious place would be BamBam’s room. Gathering everything he would need, for the studio and all Mark went to find Yugyeom first, he would need the boy’s help if he was going to get anywhere near Jackson without BamBam trying to tag along.


“You want me to what?” Yugyeom asked, popping the bubble he blew rather obnoxiously before chewing his gum some more.

“I need you to ask BamBam out. Look he’s been acting like a protecting momma bear for the past couple of days and while I appreciate it I really-”

“You want to get to Jackson and the only way to do that is if BamBam isn’t around.” Yugyeom said smiling widely. The maknae was usually always asked to do things for his hyungs but this time it seemed that Yugyeom had all the power and he was enjoying every second of it.

“What’s in it for me, I mean I was perfectly fine just lounging around before practice. You’re gonna have to give me something in return, no freebees Mark.” Yugyeom told him.

Sighing Mark knew this was coming, it couldn’t be helped. It was best to just do as the boy asked, the sooner he did that, the sooner he could get to Jackson. Mark had been planning something ahead of time…and now it was time to finally put that plan into action. Today they would settle their differences, one way or another.

“Okay Yugyeom you win what do you want?” Mark asked. The elder figured that the maknae would ask for Mark to do his chores or something, not expecting Yugyeom to say, “I need you to buy me condoms.”

“C…condoms? You do realize you’re old enough to buy your own right?” Mark said skeptically. Was that seriously all he wanted and what for anyway?

“I…I know that! But it’s embarrassing and well Youngjae said he’d get me if I kept taking his. I wouldn’t dare go near Jaebum and Jinyoung’s room.”

“Wait who’s Youngjae sleeping with?” Mark asked, wincing a bit when Yugyeom hit him. That boy was too strong for his own good.

“Mark focus, I’ve told you what I want so go get it. No one would question why you’re buying some. Everyone already thinks you’re in a relationship anyway.”

“Yugyeom what exactly do you need them for? Who are you sleeping with? Jackson wasn’t lying when he said you were sneaking out was he?!” Mark asked, exciting to know more about his maknae’s secrets.

“He was lying…it’s just that BamBam…”

“And I don’t need to know anymore! Okay come here.” Mark said, leading them to his room. Mark was quick to head to his sock drawer and pull out a handful of condoms. While Mark wasn’t fucking everyone in sight he sure as hell knew that safe sex was important.

“Okay you have your prize now,” Mark said handing them over to the tall boy. “Now go and help me get mine.”


After that getting BamBam away from Jackson was easy. Mark sent Yugyeom into the room and soon Jackson was all but shoved out the room but BamBam, saying that Yugyeom had something important to tell him but Mark knew better now. Of course after all this was over Mark would want to know when that relationship had started. It seemed that when Jackson started avoiding him, Mark had just spent his time in their room plotting on how to get Jackson to talk to him after all.

“Where are you taking me, you said you wanted to talk. I did not agree on spending any more time with you.” Jackson said, tripping a bit over a bit of trash that he hadn’t seen before. It was true, Mark had asked Jackson to talk and this whole time Mark hadn’t uttered a single word to the boy.

This…this had to go perfectly if they were going to understand each other. All of the tears shed on both sides and for what? They had lost tract of being best friends, they had hurt each other in ways indescribable and Mark was done hurting the man he loved and Mark was sure now that Jackson had only hurt Mark to protect himself. Miscommunication and secrets had broken them apart and now it was time to get back to their roots.

Mark could remember the days when he had first met Jackson When Mark had spoken even less in the past. They would speak with their bodies, when Mark was too shy to open his own mouth. Of course this was a challenge for Jackson who always seemed to need to talk but for Mark he would stay silent. They had their own secret language and Mark wanted to speak it again, if only for one last time.

“Stop complaining we’re here.” Mark finally said, getting to their destination.

“You’re taking me to the gym to talk? Mark I have to admit this is not when of your best ideas. Why couldn’t you just say what you had to say at home?” Jackson asked, rolling his eyes when Mark said nothing and headed inside.

He led them past the normal gym equipment and into the hall that contained the specialty rooms. As they passed room after room Mark could feel more anxious. What if this back fired…what if Jackson said he hated him? He knew this words would be thrown at him but…they needed to be said. An angry Jackson was better than a Jackson who ignored him, it had to be.

Finally arriving to the room he rented, the one with the double doors with a sign on it that had Jackson freezing in place. Fencing…

“You want us to fence each other? Mark no…I gave up fencing a long time ago. I said I wouldn’t pick up enough saber after I left…him.”

“Jackson, it’s time for you to stop avoiding me and it’s time for me to pay better attention to you. We once used to be each other’s anchors but I’m drowning here Jackson and I can see you aren’t far from it either. I want to tell you everything…and this is the only way to do it, so are you in or are you too afraid to face what I have to say?”

Clutching his fists Jackson looked up at Mark. Just what the hell did Mark know anyway? The boy who was silent every day, Got7’s silent member who apparently didn’t know how to shut his mouth once it was finally open. Fine he’d play his game…but only to end it.

“Don’t cry when I kick your ass Tuan.” Jackson spat before marching into the room.

“Let’s see if you can Wang.”


“Ugh…f…fuck….” Along with other profanities could be heard coming from gritted teeth. Mark tried to get a better hold but it was so fucking hard….

Mark landed on his back again, the padding he was wearing hardly loosening the blow.

“Give up yet?!” Jackson asked, his demeanor radiating nothing other than power. Mark couldn’t even land a hit on the boy. Jackson might not have fenced in a while but it was easy to see why he was a champion at it. The boy was phenomenal.

“No! I…I just want you to stop avoiding me but you aren’t saying anything. You…you’re obviously doing it for a reason so tell me why.” Mark said, sliding up to his feet to get into stance again.

“I’m not going to do this if you won’t take it fucking seriously. Do you think this is a fucking game Mark? Do you think my feelings are something you can just shit all over and then pretend as if none of it every happened?”

“I’m not pretending it never happened, I’m trying to move the fuck on!”

“Easy to say when you’re the one who fucked someone else.” Jackson yelled, before quickly lunging with his saber. Mark was lucky enough to side step out of Jackson’s way, avoiding another hit. If Mark wasn’t a dancer he probably wouldn’t be fairing as well as he was. Dance made him agile enough to at least keep up with Jackson.

“What other choice did I have? You had pushed me away too much, you shouldn’t have kept secrets from me…” Mark said, making a lunge himself, which Jackson easy avoided in time to twist and kick Mark in the back sending him staggering forward.
“You could have maybe not have fucked him? Why did you have to do that? I was pushing you away for a good reason and you fucked him because you were drunk? That doesn’t really add up Mark.”

“Yea well secrets make people do a whole lot of things that they don’t wanna do asshole. I admit that was probably a fuck up and it hurt you but…but you can’t hold me to blame for that one Jackson. Peniel helped me when you couldn’t…wouldn’t help me.”

Yelling Jackson threw his saber to the floor and tackled Mark to the floor. Not expecting Jackson to do that Mark smacked his head against the floor. His helmet doing little to make that feel any better. Mark had little time to do anything before his helmet was yanked up off his head and came face to face with Jackson dark eyes. The boy looked angry as hell and so beautiful but frustrated and so tired.

“I fucking hate you…” Jackson said, his hold on Mark’s fencing gear getting tighter and tighter as he said the words. Mark tried to swallow them down but they felt slimy and caught in his throat. His heart ached with Jackson’s and he didn’t know what to do so he did the only thing he could do, he asked.

“I…I know, what can I do to make it better? I…I fucked up.” Mark said, panting hard trying to focus on Jackson but he was feeling cramped in the suit and Jackson was so close and…and Mark didn’t want to hear those words, filled with such venom aimed towards him. He needed to get a grip on himself.

“Can you unfuck Peniel? No I didn’t think so you fucking asshole. You evil fucking asshole!” Jackson yelled, but there were tears in his eyes and Mark finally understood why he was being so rough, so full of hate. It wasn’t for Mark….it was for JYP. That man had stolen to only thing that ever mattered, Jackson’s happiness.

“Oh Jacks….” Mark said, moving his arms to wrap them around Jackson’s back. Mark could feel the boy’s body quake as he tried his hardest not to cry.

“I’m so tired of crying because of him! I’m not going to cry because of him…I made my sacrifices and I’ve lived with them, hurt people before you…but you have to make everything so difficult for me. You force me to try a thousand times harder so I can keep going. You make it so difficult to block you out, why can’t you just go cry somewhere else and get over me. Why the hell am I so special to you Mark?”

Mark could tell this was it…Jackson was finally opening up his shell just this once. Why was he so special to him? Smiling Mark already knew the answer to that one. Taking a deep breath Mark said, “It’s because you tried to be my friend. It’s because you’re my best friend. It’s because although most people think I’m a mute you know better. It’s because you won’t ever leave me alone. It’s because you smile at me…you smile at me like I’m the only thing that fucking matters and I know that isn’t true but you make me think it’s true and I love you…I love you so much and I’d do anything for you, like let you kick my ass around the gym with a fucking sword. You don’t go easy on people do you?” Mark said, reaching up to brush a tear that made it from Jackson’s eyes.

“No…then you wouldn’t be as good as you are today if you did that huh? I could list a million reasons as to why I love you but Jackson I don’t think I need to…I just need you to say yes.”

“Say yes?” Jackson whispered out, the pain in his voice sounded like it was mixed with silk. Jackson was everything and Mark was gonna prove it.

“Just say yes Jackson…” Mark said, sliding his hand behind Jackson’s head to pull him closer, his breath tickled Mark’s face.

“Don’t do it again…” Was what Jackson said instead before leaning down and finally…finally pressing his lips onto Mark’s. It wasn’t a yes but at least Mark had gotten his answer, if only half of it.

Don’t do it again could mean a lot of things and Mark was sure he was gonna break at least half of those promises but for now he was just so happy to have Jackson here on top of him.

Jackson kissed Mark as if he was starving for it, and Mar had supposed he was. After all, Jackson had been waiting much longer than Mark. Jackson was quick to lean up and start removing his fencing gear, piece by piece the uniform flew all over the wooden floors of the gym.

“Take that shit off.” Jackson said as he began to help Mark undo the uniform, his hands moving fast and sure. Soon enough they were both in equal states of being half naked in the middle of a semi-public gym. Although Mark had rented the room he doesn’t remember locking to door but at this point who cares. All he could focus on were the sounds Jackson was making and the way his skin felt against his own and the way his warm mouth felt, pressed right against him.

“I love you…”

“I love you too….”


When they came back Mark and Jackson wanted nothing more than a shower, after all they were all sticky and gross after what had happened in the gym. Jackson’s hand was intertwined with Mark’s and he couldn’t feel any happier. Once they arrived however the happiness was ruined. Once they walked right into the dorm Jaebum called them into the living room and once they got inside they came face to face with JYP himself and he did not look happy.

The man Mark once looked up to, Mark now saw as a villain and the way he was looking at their connected hands with disgust made Mark sick. They had all been betrayed by the man they trusted. It was time for JYP to beg.

“So I’ve asked if JYP could come down to our apartment today because we all have some things we need to get off our chest.”

“You know you two can stop holding hands now that we’re just in your dormitory. Jackson you don’t need to pretend around me.” JYP said, still staring at their conjoined fingers.

“No…I…I’m not pretending anymore. You…you can’t take Mark away from me.”

“Take him away? Now why would I do that? Jaebum said you all had something important to tell me so spit it out, I’m a very busy man.”

“Don’t play dumb…Mark and I are in a relationship, a real one. We were just in the gym right now and we were-”

“I think what Jackson is trying to say is that he wants his contract adjusted so that can may make his relationship with Mark real and not made under false pretenses.” Jaebum said, pulling Jinyoung closer towards him for support.

“Adjust his contract for what? We had an understanding Jackson. You aren’t allowed to date him. Release his and at once. You’re breaking the rules that we had set in place for you.”

“You can’t stop me from loving anyone! You’ve already taken so much from me…no more!”

“Jackson I’ll be forced to release you from Got7.”

“For what, being gay? You wouldn’t dare, people love me too much.” Jackson said confidentily but wavered a bit when JYP started to laugh.

“You’re replaceable, Mark is just as replaceable if not more! You will do as I say. I won’t have some faggots in my company!” JYP yelled. “I dealed with Markson because it gave me some money but I will not have this…this filth that you are partaking in, in this company.”

“You have no right to say that! We can love whoever the hell we wait.”

“No! I own you and you will do as I fucking say!” JYP yelled, marching towards them. It almost looked as if he was going to hit them but Yugyeom was quick to catch his arm.


“Let go of me boy, there are plenty of other great dancers out there. Do as you’re told.”

“My my…JYP is this seriously how you feel? You would fire us all because we’re gay?” Jaebum said, smiling that devilish way of his,

“We’re? What are you going on about?”

“Well you see, Jackson and Mark aren’t they only faggots in Got7. Jinyoung and I would like to say that we are madly in love and in case you don’t believe me well….” Jaebum said before grabbing Jinyoung around the waist and pulling him forward to place a kiss on his lips.

The slap that was heard sounded loud through the room. Mark turned his head to the side to stare into the eyes of the monster that had just slapped him. Jackson quickly moved to hit JYP but Jaebum yelled, “Enough! I think I’ve heard enough. JYP fix Jackson’s along with anyone else you have bullied contracts or face the consciences.”

“Oh yea and just what the fuck are you going to do. I have all the power! You all obey me, I am the one in charge you ungrateful little fucks.”

“Not anymore…” Jaebum said before lifting his shirt to show that he was wearing a wire of some sort.

“Youngjae’s been recording everything you’ve said while BamBam has you on video. If you don’t want this to go public then you’ll do as we ask.”

“You little-”

“Do as we’ve said, I’m sure another company would love to have a bunch of faggots if they were GOT7 members. You don’t have the power JYP, we do.” Jinyoung had tears in his eyes as he looked as his boyfriend. This wasn’t just for Mark and Jackson, it was a victory for all of them.


“So Mark how does it feel to finally be dating Jackson?” The radio show woman asked.

“Oh I’m sorry…what was the question?” Mark asked, trying to keep calm but Jackson currently had has hand under the table and had insisted on touching Mark. Jackson was a dead man when they got home.

“I asked how does it feel to finally be dating Jackson Wang. Many fans around the world are very envious.”

“Well what can I say? While I love pleasing my fans, this is one thing I would like to keep to myself. Dating Jackson is a dream.”

“Is that why your album this go around is the concept of unbreakable love? Has your relationship influenced that? It’s quite popular and the songs feel so much more…powerful.”

Mark had to take a deep breath before answering because Jackson was being evil…who knew the boy’s hands were just as talented as his hips.

“Honestly the album was inspired by our friendship first. The album is called Bonds because no matter what a true friend would do anything and everything for the person they care about, for the person they love.”

“So are you finally admitting that you’re wildly in love with Jackson?” The hostess asked.

Smiling Mark took Jackson’s visible hand that was resting on the table and said, “Yes, I’m stupidly in love with  Jackson.







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